Parshas Chayei Sarah - Thanksgiving: Out of the Foxhole and into the Parking Spot

~ Thoughts on the Parsha ~

Parshas Chayei Sarah

Thanksgiving:

Out of the Foxhole and into the Parking Spot

                                                                    By: Daniel Listhaus

 “And the man bowed low and prostrated himself to Hashem. He said, ‘Blessed is Hashem, G-d of my master Avraham, Who has not withheld His kindness and truth from my master; as for me, Hashem has guided me in the way to the house of my master’s brothers.”

 -Chayei Sarah 24:26-27

            Avraham sent his servant, Eliezer, to find a wife for Yitzchak. If we stop to think about it, Eliezer truly had a great responsibility. Avraham trusted that Eliezer would not just find the proper wife for Yitzchak, but the proper matriarch for B’nei Yisroel. There is no doubt that the trust that Avraham had in Eliezer was developed over their many years together and Eliezer becoming a great person from spending time in Avraham avinu’s house.[1] Eliezer recognized the importance of his assignment and understood that the only way he could carry it out successfully was to daven to Hashem to help him find the right person. The passukim (verses) describe in detail the tefillos that Eliezer davened to Hashem to give him a sign when he would cross paths with the right wife for Yitzchak. Not only does the Torah mention Eliezer’s tefillos, but it expresses that the story line played out exactly as he davened and then repeats the whole episode again when Eliezer told it over to Lavan and Besuel in their house. Rashi[2] points the repetitiveness and says in the name of Rebbe Acha that the conversation of the slaves of the avos (patriarchs) is more pleasing before Hashem than the Torah of their descendants; for the episode of Eliezer is repeated expressly in the Torah, while many essential elements of the Torah were given only by allusion.” Indeed the middos and mehalech in life that we learn for generations is based on the interactions and ma’aseh avos siman l’banim from the avos themselves. It is as essential as the halachos of the Torah, in fact derech eretz kadmah l’torah, and is an essential part of Torah shel ba’al peh – mishnayos Avos.

            Tefillah is something which is part of every Jew’s daily routine. We daven three times a day representing the tefillos implemented by the Avos[3] and although over the years we have accepted a universal structure to the davening, there is no question that personal prayers and requests are not just proper, but arguably required, throughout the day as we humble ourselves before Hashem and recognize that we are nothing without his constant help. The realization that we need Hashem to help us is one which, for many, comes and goes. The saying goes that there is no such thing as an atheist in a foxhole, but sadly the underlying meaning of that aphorism often extends to even the most religious. The Torah itself describes the difficulty man has of recognizing G-d’s involvement in one’s personal life when one achieves success through means which seem natural. As people we are programmed to recognize pattern, and the pattern of cause and effect is one that was built into the briyah (creation) as a guide but could also be misleading to the one who does not stop to think hard of what the real causes and effects are. However, even those who do take time out of their day to stop and personally ask Hashem for help with their day, and even those who stop to take the time to ask Hashem for help even for the things which we think we are “capable” of doing on our “own”, there is something which is often forgotten – saying thank you.

            There is a joke told of a man who is running late to an important meeting. When he reaches the office he cannot find an open parking spot. In desperation he davens to Hashem and says, “Hashem please give me a parking spot; and if You give me a parking spot I promise that I will be a better person.” Suddenly, a spot opens up right in front of him. He races over and takes the spot proudly. After putting his car in park, exiting his car and locking the doors, he looks up and says, “Never mind, I found one myself!”

            Even the times we remember that G-d is in charge and are able to humble ourselves to ask for His assistance, we often forget to turn back and say thank you to Hashem when we recognize our tefillos were accepted. Instead, like the man looking for the parking spot, the approach of many is to say, “I’m glad things worked out, because Hashem would have probably taken a long time to return my call”.

            The episode of Eliezer finding a wife for Yitzchak is remarkable on many accounts. However, one of the points that often goes unnoticed is the fact that at every opportunity along the way Eliezer takes the time to reflect and give thanks to Hashem for helping him and answering his tefillos. After Rivkah offered to get water for Eliezer and his camels and Eliezer realized that she was the right wife for Yitzchak, the passuk writes that he bowed and gave thanks to Hashem. Even when Eliezer recounted the series of events leading to his meeting Rivkah, he included the fact that he thanked Hashem as an integral part of the storyline. A few passukim later after Lavan and Besuel agree to Eliezer’s proposal to bring Rivkah back to Yitzchak as a wide, Eliezer again bowed to Hashem over hearing the good news. Davening yields results and demands a sense of gratitude. There is no real separation between the two.

            If these were the middos of eved Avraham we could only imagine how great our forefather Avraham was with his deep understanding of Hashem being Creator, Master and Director of the world. This is not a theme tied to a specific day but rather one which is timeless and constant. We must learn from this parsha our responsibility to not only turn to Hashem and depend on Him completely to help us through life but also to remember to turn back and say thank you.

            May Hashem help us all and guide us accordingly through our lives and provide us with all our needs as a k’lal and as individuals. Thank you Hashem for all that You have done for us, all that You do for us, and all that we have faith that You will continue to do for all of K’lal Yisroel!

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[1] Additionally, Avraham also made Eliezer swear. See Beraishis 24:2-4

[2] Beraishis 24:42

[3] See Gemara Berachos 26b. Another opinion maintains that shacharis and mincha were established based in the karbon tamid that was offered morning and afternoon. 

Parshas Lech Lecha - Mind Your Surroundings

~ Thoughts on the Parsha ~

Parshas Lech Lecha

Mind Your Surroundings

By: Daniel Listhaus

וַיֹּאמֶר ה' אֶל אַבְרָם לֶךְ-לְךָ מֵאַרְצְךָ וּמִמּוֹלַדְתְּךָ וּמִבֵּית אָבִיךָ אֶלהָאָרֶץ אֲשֶׁר אַרְאֶךָּ: וְאֶעֶשְׂלְגוֹי גָּדוֹל וַאֲבָרֶכְךָ וַאֲגַדְּלָה שְׁמֶךָ וֶהְיֵה בְּרָכָה

“Hashem said to Avram, 'Go for yourself from your land, from your birthplace, and from your father's house to the land that I will show you. And I will make of you a great nation; I will bless you, and I will make your name great, and you will be a blessing.'”

-Lech Lecha 12:1-2

            The mishna[1] mentions that there were ten tests that Avraham avinu was given and he passed all of them, demonstrating the incredible amount of love Avraham must have had for Hashem. One of these ten tests is the opening passuk (verse) of this week's parsha.[2] Hashem commanded Avraham to leave his birthplace and his father's house and to keep traveling until Hashem would tell him that he had reached his destination. Imagine getting into your car and start traveling to an unknown place with no idea where you were going, and no clue how long it would take to get there. Certainly only someone with absolute trust and love would be willing to blindly follow such instructions.

            The passuk[3] tells us that upon commanding Avraham to leave his house, Hashem promised that He would bless Avraham and make him into a great nation. Rashi[4] writes that this is what Hashem was hinting to in the words “lech lecha” - literally “go for yourself”. Hashem conditioned Avraham's having children and ultimately becoming a great nation as well as becoming famous in the world on his listening to the tzivui (direct commandment) to leave his land and be prepared to journey to the mysterious land which Hashem promised to later show him. It was therefore for Avraham's benefit and pleasure that he leave his land in order to merit these blessings.

            Although this Rashi seems pretty simple on the surface, it becomes problematic when one reads the next Rashi. The next Rashi[5] comments that the reason that Hashem needed to promise these three things specifically was because of the following. When one travels, there are three things which consequentially diminish. When one is on the road there is less opportunity for reproduction, money gets spent faster, and it is almost impossible to maintain a good name because one is never settled in a single place long enough. Therefore, Hashem promised Avraham that if he obeys the commandment to leave, Hashem will guarantee that he will still merit children and become a father of a nation, become extremely wealthy, and maintain his good name.

            These Rashi's seem to contradict each other. The first Rashi explains that the berachos were conditioned on Avraham's leaving, yet the second Rashi implies that these berachos were only necessary to persuade Avraham that despite the fact he was traveling he would receive these things. However, we all know that an ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure. So why not the following simple solution: Let Avraham stay home and not diminish his possibility of having children, his money, and his name, and there would be no reason to have to promise the things that he would be missing by traveling away from home?

            Perhaps we could suggest the following. Certainly, Avraham avinu could have not traveled and still have been able to have children, and granted he could have become wealthy and achieved a great name. However, the quality of these things would have a ceiling based on the affect of staying in his father's house. In commanding Avraham to leave his birthplace and home, Hashem was telling him that he must go for himself, for his own benefit and pleasure in order to be able to achieve the superior quality of these things. Somehow staying in the house of Terach or even in the vicinity of his birthplace would have a limiting affect on Avraham's potential.

            The problem with this answer, though, is that Avraham already proved to the world that the fact that he grew up in the house of avodah zarrah was something he had immunity to. The medrash[6]  describes that Terach used to run an idol shop. One day, Terach had to leave town and Avraham took over running the business for the day. While on the job, a man entered the shop to purchase an idol. Avraham asked him, “How old are you?” The man replied, “Sixty years old”. Avraham then said to him, “You mean to tell me that you are sixty and yet you wish to purchase an idol to worship that was made a day ago?” The man, embarrassed, left the store without buying anything. Later that day a woman came with flour and wanted to buy an avodah zarrah to feed and worship. Avraham took a stick and started smashing all the idols in the store. Then, he placed the stick next to the largest idol. When his father came home he asked Avraham what in the world had happened. Avraham told him that the idols had started fighting with each other and finally the biggest idol came and smashed all the other ones. This event ultimately led to him brought before Nimrod and being thrown into the furnace in front of the entire community in order to demonstrate what happens to someone who does not believe in the avodah zarrah, however as we know, Avraham came out alive and a tremendous kiddush Hashem was made.

            Clearly Avraham avinu was someone who was not affected by those around him. He made his own decisions, came to his own realizations, and was not willing to believe in things which made no sense to him, even if those alternatives would have allowed him to live a care-free life with no restrictions. He did not care what his family thought of him, he did not care what his community thought of him, and he did not care about what Nimrod thought of him. If so, why was it necessary for him to move out of his birthplace? Everything he was to gain he could have just not lost by staying put and additionally, he seemed to be immune to his environment so what was there to lose by staying?

             Later in the parsha, during the Bris Bein Ha'besarim between Avraham and Hashem, Hashem promised Avraham that he will give Eretz Yisroel to his children. When describing the boundaries of Eretz Yisroel, Hashem says, “To your descendents I have given this land, from the river of Egypt to the great river, the Euphrates River....”[7] Rashi[8] writes that despite the fact that when the Torah mentions the four rivers which came out of Gan Eden, the Euphrates was mentioned last,[9] still the Torah refers to it here as the “great river” simply because it was close to Eretz Yisroel. Rashi continues to say that the slave of a king is a king and one who stays close to a ruler will be bowed down to. In other words, the types of things we associate ourselves with and the types of people we are close with not only has a profound effect on the way we are perceived by others, but even has an effect on how we begin to feel about ourselves. The river mentioned last of the ones going out of Gan Eden, becomes a “great river” merely by being adjacent to Eretz Yisroel.

            Similarly, Rashi tells us that one of the Pharaoh’s had seen all the miracles that Hashem had done for Sarah and the house of Avraham. He therefore declared, “Better my daughter be a slave in Sarah's house than a main wife in another household”, and he gave his daughter, Haggar as a maidservant for Sarah. Even Pharaoh realized that people are affected by who they spend their time with. There is no comparison between a maidservant in the house of Avraham and being a main wife in a different house. Avraham's household was one of pure royalty, worshiping only Hashem and meriting miracles, and those who were around him benefited greatly.

            Perhaps with this we could better understand the reason why Avraham had to leave his father's house. When it came to telling Avraham to leave his land, granted he could have had the berachos to some degree by staying where he was, but indeed it would have been of lesser quality. Even Avraham, who was a master of fighting avodah zarrah and seemed to be immune to the people around him,  would have still been lacking because of who he would be hanging around with. In order to achieve the highest quality of the berachos he had to separate himself and leave the bad environment behind him. Certainly this was a difficult task for Avraham to be willing to leave his land where he had done so much and proven to be immune to the ideologies of those around him, yet he was still willing to pick up and move in order to reach higher and achieve the berachos with a superior quality that could only be achieved by completely disassociating himself with those around him.

            If this is true of Avraham, it is surely true of us as well. May Hashem help us choose the paths we take carefully so that we do not find ourselves associating with those who will lessen the quality of who we are able to be.

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[1]    Avos 5:4

[2]    There is a machlokes (dispute) how to count the ten test. Some Rishonim learn that Avraham being thrown into the fire, though not explicitly in the Torah, was the first test. Others learn that this nisayon (test) of “lech lecha” to move away from his family was the first test.

[3]    Beraishis 12:2

[4]    Rashi Beraishis 12:1

[5]    Rashi Beraishis 12:2

[6]    Beraishis Rabbah 38:13

[7]    Beraishis 15:18

[8]    Ibid.

[9]    See Beraishis 2:14

Parshas Noach - Listen to Your Messages

~ Thoughts on the Parsha ~

Parshas Noach

Choose The One to Hear Your Voicemail:

Listen to Your Messages

By: Daniel Listhaus

וַיְהִי כָל הָאָרֶץ שָׂפָה אֶחָת וּדְבָרִים אֲחָדִים

“Now the entire earth was of one language and uniform word”

-Noach 11:1

            As we head towards the peak of a tense election time with such a strong split regarding policies which have been or should be implemented, it is hard to imagine a world which works together.^[1] Try to picture a peaceful world where seldom is heard a discouraging word; a world with a United Nations which sits down for months thinking together to make the world a better a place with no ulterior motives to benefit certain individuals, parties, or nations. As impossible as this situation is to fathom, it indeed occurred in the history of this world.

            The people who were living during the generation known as the dor haflaga (Generation of the Disunion)^[2], were all direct descendents of Noach. Noach lived through a time when every single human and animal outside the teivah (ark) was destroyed by the mabbbul (flood). The earth had become too corrupt.^[3] Mankind had gotten into the habit of abusing each other in the worst ways, and this corruptness trickled down to the creations of the world.^[4] Hashem decided that, besides for Noach and his family, no one could be permitted to live in the world. After patiently awaiting a teshuva (repentance) movement which never occurred,^[5] Hashem sent a mabbul to kill everything on the earth middah-k'negged-middah (measure for measure).[6] Now, several generations after the most violent and back-stabbing of times, the people of the world were all united, spoke the same language, and wanted to work together on the same agenda – they wanted to build a tower.

            The Torah^[7] describes that the people joined together to build the tower because they thought that doing so could prevent future floods like the one the world had recently experienced during that time. However, although their purpose was clear, Rashi^[8] offers three possibilities as to what exactly their trigger reason was to start this project. Rashi's first suggestion is that the people came with a uniform plan to wage war with G-d. They decided that it was not fair that Hashem be the one and only King, so they figured that they could build a tower tall enough to be able to approach Hashem in the heavens. The second possible reason Rashi relates is that the people simply joined together to speak out against Hashem. Rashi's third possibility is that the people calculated that the mabbul occurred in the year 1656.^[9] They therefore assumed that this would be an event which would be cycled every 1656 years. In order to prepare for the next scheduled mabbul according to this calculation, the dor haflaga  wanted to get a head start on building structures in the world to support the skies so that the firmament would not be able to collapse again as it did during the time of the mabbul.^[10] Regardless of their reason, we know that Hashem saw what they were doing and exclaimed, “Behold, one people and one language for all of them and this is what they begin to do! And now, should it not be withheld from them all that they proposed to do? Come, let us^[11] descend there and confuse their language, so that they should not understand one another's language.”^[12]

            There is no doubt that the dor haflaga must have been wrong for doing what they did, after all Hashem was quite upset with them. Knowing this, the aforementioned Rashi becomes difficult to understand. Granted within the first two reasons Rashi writes was the engine behind what they were doing, we could comprehend why Hashem was angry. However, what was so bad if we learn according to the third explanation Rashi suggested? If the people of the dor haflaga really thought that the mabbul was on some schedule to occur every 1656 years, so be it! Let them be involved in their stupidity and waste their time building useless towers, as long as they are not bothering anyone. What did they do wrong that should upset Hashem so much that it was worth it to disturb the peace that existed at that particular point?

            Many of us have probably at some point attempted to solve pattern riddles. For example. Look at the following sequence and think of what should follow: 0, 1, 3, 6, 10, 15, 21, 28, ??. Many of us may look at this sequence and try to figure out what it is trying to communicate and what should therefore follow.^[13] However, we all have that one friend who insists that the answer (in this case) is 0. After all, this sequence of eight numbers is completely random. The blank at the end just restarts the same pattern over again. This is what I call the Pattern Fallacy – the idea that anyone could make anything into something insignificant by saying that it is not inherently meaningful.

            Interestingly, many of us think that we are not subject to this. We look at the sequence and say that anyone who answers 0 is out of his mind. We would never think to suggest such a ridiculous thing. This though is not true. We do fall into this trap and are indeed very inconsistent in when we decide to view something as independently significant and when we disregard it as a baseless coincidence.

            Many years ago, the public started noticing a number of similarities between President Lincoln and President Kennedy. Lincoln was elected to congress in 1846, Kennedy in 1946. Lincoln was elected President in 1860, Kennedy in 1960. Both presidents had a son die during their presidency. Both presidents were shot in their heads from behind, while with their wives, on a Friday, while being accompanied by another couple. Lincoln was shot by John Wilkes Booth in Ford's Theater, Kennedy was shot by Lee Harvey Oswald in a Lincoln (made by Ford). John Wilkes Booth ran from a theater to a warehouse, Oswald ran from a warehouse to a theater. Booth was born in 1839, Oswald in 1939. And both were killed within the same calendar month before their trial.

            At the time these similarities were noticed, some read them and started getting excited for no apparent reason, while others looked at them and said that the similarities were completely by chance and the article would have been just as special if it pointed out that both presidents were men, citizens of the United States, enjoyed good food, had two arms, and wore shoes.

            People care about things that are meaningful to them. Meaningful things have intrinsic value and are not viewed as random or ordinary. Rather, valued things are viewed as unique and customized. On the other side, things which people care less about and do not feel are worth the time to figure out, get labeled as meaningless patterns.

            The Rambam^[14] writes that one of the most fundamental beliefs is that Hashem is not only the borei (creator) of the world but also the manhig (director). This idea of Hashem being the manhig, really applies on two levels, which are really one. First, it means that Hashem arranges the endless probabilities, combinations, and permutations of the world in order that everyone is delivered a customized experience in this world – perfect for one's needs.^[15] Second, it means that Hashem interacts with us and communicates to us in ways that we are able to notice if we just open our eyes. Whether it be evil decrees made by a dictator, a freak accident, or nature acting slightly unnaturally, there are two routes one could take. One perspective is to say, “There is nothing inherently special about anything. Everything happens at some point randomly anyway.” The other perspective is to recognize the weird parts of life as Hashem trying to catch our attention and challenging us to think.

            Perhaps this is the suggestion that Rashi is offering in his third answer. The people of the dor haflaga failed to recognize the mabbul as a lesson for generations to understand the type of lifestyle we must run from. They determined it as a random piece of a meaningless cycle, instead of realizing it as a an inherently meaningful message directly from the manhig of the world. Hashem conveyed a clear message to the world – a tremendous flood which only one family was miraculously saved from via the teivah, and these people just completely missed the boat.^[16]

            In our lives we are sent messages from Hashem. Some are for us as part of the tzibbur (public), and some are for us for our personal lives. However, only if receiving messages from Hashem is meaningful to us will we recognize when we are being contacted. Otherwise, we fall into the Pattern Fallacy and attribute events not to the manhig of the world, but instead to randomness.

            We will continue to receive messages whether we like it or not. However, we could only begin to unlock these messages once we consciously choose to want to hear what Hashem is trying to tell us. This is what it takes for us to access our voicemail.                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                         

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[1]    This was written right before President Obama's second term when Governor Mitt Romney was running for president.

[2]    They received this name after Hashem divided them by making them not speak the same language.

[3]    Beraishis 6:11 and Rashi there                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                

[4]    See Rashi to Beraishis 6:12 and 6:20.                                                

[5]    See Rashi to Beraishis 6:14 who writes that Hashem had Noach build the ark for so many years instead of just miraculously creating one for Noach in order that the people would see him building the ark and ask what it was for. Hashem hoped that upon hearing what Hashem was planning to do to the world, that the people would do teshuva.              

[6]    For example, see Rashi Beraishis 7:4

[7]    Beraishis 11:3-4

[8]    Beraishis 11:1

[9]    The year according to the Jewish calendar from Creation when Adam was born.

[10]  See the Medrash Rabbah (38:6) which says that they wanted to build four such towers – for the North, South, East, and West.

[11]  Rashi (11:7) explains that Hashem said 'us' because he consulted the heavenly court of angels out of extreme humility. We see the same idea in Beraishis (1:26) when Hashem said “Let us create nan...”

[12]  Beraishis 11:5-7

[13]  The answer is 36. 0+1=1 +2=3 +3=6 +4=10 +5=15 +6=21 +7=28 +8=36

[14]  See the thirteenth Ani Ma'amin (Principles of Faith)

[15]  For more on this subject see my d'var Torah on Parshas Vayeishev 2011“Chaos Theory or Control Reality”

[16]  Pun intended. Sorry.