Parshas Tetzaveh - Measure for Measure

~ Thoughts on the Parsha ~

Parshas Tetzaveh

Measure for Measure

By: Daniel Listhaus

וְעָשִׂיתָ בִגְדֵי קֹדֶשׁ לְאַהֲרֹן אָחִיךָ לְכָבוֹד וּלְתִפְאָרֶת: וְאַתָּה תְּדַבֵּר אֶל כָּל חַכְמֵי לֵב אֲשֶׁר מִלֵּאתִיו רוּחַ חָכְמָה וְעָשׂוּ אֶת בִּגְדֵי אַהֲרֹן לְקַדְּשׁוֹ לְכַהֲנוֹ לִי

וְחֵשֶׁב אֲפֻדָּתוֹ אֲשֶׁר עָלָיו כְּמַעֲשֵׂהוּ מִמֶּנּוּ יִהְיֶה זָהָב תְּכֵלֶת וְאַרְגָּמָן וְתוֹלַעַת שָׁנִי וְשֵׁשׁ מָשְׁזָר

“You shall make garments of sanctity for Aharon your brother, for glory and for splendor. And you shall speak to each of the wise-hearted people whom I have invested with a spirit of wisdom, and they shall make the garments of Aharon, to sanctify him, so that he shall be a Kohen to Me.”

-Tetzaveh 28:2-3

“...[And] the cheishev with which he is beautified, which is above it, like its work, of it shall be of gold, turquoise wool, purple wool, scarlet wool, and twisted linen.”

-Tetzaveh 28:8

            There is no doubt that the bigdei kehunah (special clothes that the kohanim had to wear) were spectacular and royal. When it comes to discussing the cheishev (belt), Rashi^[1] writes that the Kohen Gadol's cheishev was the belt above the eiphod (apron) which beautified and enhanced the Kohen, and adorned him.

            There are two issues with the way Rashi explains this passuk (verse). First, even though certainly one aspect of the bigdei kehunah was to make the kohen look prestigious, why is it that this aspect is stressed so much in the Torah and this Rashi? It sounds as if this was the most important fact of the bigdei kehunah. Second, this Rashi does not seem to flow so well. Rashi starts by explaining that the bigdei kehunah beautified and enhanced the kohen. Then, Rashi adds in as an after-thought that the bigdei kehunah also adorned him. Why does Rashi not list all three descriptions as part of the same series?

            However, there is an even more potent question, regarding the bigdei kehuna in general, which stems from an understanding of a story in the Gemara. The Gemara^[2] relates a story of a non-Jew who overheard someone teaching his talmidim (students) about the garments that the kohen gadol would wear. This man went over to Shammai and told him that he wanted to convert in order to become the kohen gadol and wear the eight pieces of bigdei kohen gadol. Shammai's immediate response was to chase him out with a stick. This individual then went to Hillel and told him the same thing, that he wanted to become Jewish in order to be able to become the kohen gadol and wear the special garments. Hillel listened patiently and advised this gentile to first learn all the halachos (laws) of being a kohen. The man did so, but when he got up to the passuk (verse), “The stranger that comes near shall be put to death”,^[3] he was very confused. He asked Hillel, “Who does this passuk refer to?” Hillel replied, “This passuk even applies to Dovid HaMelech. Anyone who is not a kohen cannot do the avodah (work in the Beis HaMikdash).” The Gemara then continues to say that despite the fact that this man's aspirations were shot, he ultimately became Jewish anyway because of Hillel's patience.

            The Kli Yakar^[4] is bothered by this whole story. Who did this guy think he was? If he just wanted a good Purim costume, why go through the whole process of becoming Jewish and having to accept the Torah and mitzvos? He should have just went to the local costume store and bought a similar copy made in China! Was this man for real that he wanted to convert just so that he could wear the garments of the kohen gadol?

            The Kli Yakar therefore answers that it must be that this gentile heard more than just the list of special garments that the kohen wore. Rather, he must have overheard a Rabbi describing the following Gemara. The Gemara^[5] lists the four garments of the kohen hedyot (regular kohen) and the additional four garments of the kohen gadol. The Gemara then elaborates that each of the garments acted as an atonement for different great sins.^[6] Upon hearing this, the gentile had an idea. He knew that he had done horrible things in his life, and he wanted to start anew. He thought that achieving the position of kohen gadol and getting the chance to adorn these garments would grant him the quick-fix absolution needed to rest his mind of guilt.

            This whole concept is so hard to understand. What did the bigdei kehunah have to do with atoning sins? Could it really be that because the kohen would dress up in a certain way, that we become “off the hook” for some of the horrible things we have done?^[7]

            In order to answer these questions, let us take a step back and try to understand the role that the bigdei kehunah played in adorning the Kohen in the Beis HaMikdash.

            The Malbim^[8] makes an incredible observation. He writes that a word used to describe the bigdei kehunah is “mada”. The word mada comes from the root meaning measurement. The reason for this is simply because one gets his clothing tailored according to the dimensions of his guf (body). The body's measurements are what one uses to deduce the accurate size of one's clothing.

            Similarly, one's character traits are called middos – referring to the different allocations of qualities that each and every individual uniquely possesses. People are born with different measurements of haughtiness, humility, embarrassment, brazenness, anger, patience, etc. Our job, as the Orchos Tzadikkim^[9] maintains, is to study and analyze each middah and realize where it is inside us. Then, we must work on each and every middah and qualify it in a positive direction. Every middah could be directed to be used for good or bad. It is our duty to make sure that our middos are shaped in the right way.

            The Malbim continues to write that the reason for the kohen to wear the bigdei kehunah – the outer measurements which cover his body, was in order to have an effect and guide the inner measurements – the middos surrounding his nefesh (soul).

            Each of the garments of the kohen gadol represented some of the most difficult and important middos of which a person must take control – the direct effects of kinah (jealousy), taivah (desires), and kavod (honor), which Pirkei Avos^[10] describe “remove a person from this world”.

            Somehow, merely wearing the types of clothing that the kohen gadol wore, brought about these good middos from the kohen gadol, and had him thinking along pure thoughts in these areas. It is no coincidence that the sins that the bigdei kehunah atoned for were done due to lack of control in the middos that they each represented. These pure thoughts of the kohen, the representative of the entire Jewish people, when wearing the begadim, received a collective kaparah for the entire B'nei Yisroel.

            Perhaps now we could better appreciate the aforementioned Rashi. The bigdei kehunah served multiple purposes. On the one hand they adorned the kohen – giving him a prestigious and royal look to stand out above everyone else as the one chosen to serve Hashem.^[11] Additionally, the bigdei kehunah were designated garments only used to serve Hashem, expressing incredible amounts of kavod Hashem. However, a third aspect of the bigdei kehunah was to effect and direct the kohen's thoughts in order to spark a kaparah.

            The clothing we wear has the ability to give power to and bring forth certain aspects of the middos contained within us. Movie producers are well aware of this fact and indeed have their actors wear the clothing of their respective characters for a long time before the actual filming in order to get the full feel of the character. The clothing they wear is able to draw out different measurements of their born-qualities, thereby creating almost new people within themselves based on their influenced temporary choice of characteristics.

            The clothing we wear has an impact on the way we think and act. Let us choose carefully in order that the measurements of the guf should have a positive impact on the measurements of the nefesh; for indeed the way we dress effects our middos – measure for measure.

---

[1]    Shemos 28:8

[2]    Shabbos 31a

[3]    Bamidbar 3:10

[4]    Shemos 28:39. The Kli Yakar later continues to get into a whole discussion about Achashveirosh during the Purim story when he wore the bigdei kehunah and used the keilim from the Beis HaMikdash.

[5]    Eiruchin 16a

[6]    The Gemara lists the following begadim and that for which they atoned:

ñ            Kesones (tunic) – shfichus damim (murder/bloodshed)

ñ            Michnasa'im (pants) – giluy arayos (immorality)

ñ            Mechaperes (turban) – gasei haruach (arrogance)

ñ            Avneit (belt) – hirhur lev (improper thoughts of the heart)

ñ            Choshein (breastplate) – dinim (incorrect judging)

ñ            Eiphod (apron) – avoda zarah (idol worship)

ñ            Me'il (jacket) – lashon harah (evil speech)

ñ            Tzitz (head-plate) – ma'aseh azei panim (brazen acts)

[7]    Berachos 28a

[8]    Shemos 28:15

[9]    He writes this in his introduction to the sefer as well as throughout his sefer when discussing the various character traits.

[10]  Avos 4:28

[11]  See S'forno on Shemos 28:2

Parshas Toldos - Don’t Pick Your Poison

~ Thoughts on the Parsha ~

Parshas Toldos

Don’t Pick Your Poison

                                                                   By: Daniel Listhaus

וַיְהִי כִּי זָקֵן יִצְחָק וַתִּכְהֶיןָ עֵינָיו מֵרְאֹת וַיִּקְרָא אֶת עֵשָׂו | בְּנוֹ הַגָּדֹל וַיֹּאמֶר אֵלָיו בְּנִי וַיֹּאמֶר אֵלָיו :הִנֵּנִי

“And it was when Yitzchak had become old, and his eyes were dimmed from seeing, that he summoned Eisav, his older son, and said to him, ‘My son.’ And he said to him, Here I am.’”

 -Toldos 27:1

            Before relating the episode of Yaakov ultimately receiving the berachos (blessings) from Yitzchak, the Torah describes that the reality was that Yitzchak had intended to give the berachos to Eisav. The passuk (verse) begins the story by setting the scene that Yitzchak had become hard of sight in his old age. This ultimately played a vital role in Yaakov’s ability to pretend that he was Eisav in order that he would be able to receive the berachos. However, the cause of Yitzchak’s eyesight loss is one of major dispute.

            The Rashbam[1] learns simply Yitzchak’s blindness was a pure function of old age. After all, it is common for people to begin losing their eyesight when they are older, and that is precisely what happened to Yitzchak. As proof to this, the Rashbam brings a passuk[2] from Navi regarding Eili ha’kohen who lost his eyesight when he reached old age. Interestingly, the S’forno[3] also quotes a passuk[4] in Navi regarding Eili’s dimmed eyes which states, “And Eili was 98 years old, and his eyes were set, and he could not see.” However, the S’forno specifies, supported from another passuk[5], that Eili lost his eyesight not of old age but rather because he looked the other way while his sons acted inappropriately as kohanim. Presumably, the S’forno mentions this to parallel to Yitzchak and seems to hold that Yitzchaks’s loss of eyesight was a punishment for looking the other way while his own son, Eisav, was committing horrible aveiros (sins) under his watch, so to speak.  

            The Ba’al Ha’Turim,[6] based on the Medrash[7], also attributes Yitzchak’s blindness to being Yitzchak’s fault. He writes that Yitzchak was accepting of Eisav’s bribes; and the passuk says, “…And you shall not take a bribe, for bribery blinds the eyes of the wise…”[8]

            Rashi[9] presents three alternative explanations as to what caused Yitzchak’s blindness. Unlike the other meforshim (commentaries), Rashi connects the blindness to one of three completely external causes. Rashi’s first explanation is that it was caused from the smoke of avodah zarrah that Eisav’s wives would offer in the house. The Ramban[10] further clarifies that certainly Yitzchak was unaware that they were serving avodah zarrah under his own roof, for if that was the case he would have without a doubt stopped them immediately. Rather, he was under the impression that they were serving l’shem Sha’mayim, and yet it had a profound effect on him for the reality was that it was for avodah zarrah purposes.

            Rashi’s second reason is that the blindness was rooted from the time of the akeidah when Avraham avinu was tested by Hashem to see if he would follow the tzivuy Hashem to the point of being willing to give up his own son. At that time when Avraham stood over his son Yitzchak ready to do what Hashem had asked, the Heavens opened and the malachei ha’shareis saw and stared crying. The tears they shed dropped into Yitzchak’s eyes and caused him to lose his sight.[11]

            Rashi’s third explanation is that Yitzchak’s eyesight loss had absolutely nothing to do with his age or any experience from his lifetime. Rather, Rashi suggests that Yitzchak’s loss of eyesight was directed by Hashem as a necessary means for Yaakov to ultimately be able to receive the berachos through means of pretending to be EIsav as the story played out.

            If we take a moment to step back we would notice that, with only one exception, every single one of the aforementioned p’shatim (explanations) have something in common – they are all valid explanations as to why Yitzchak alone was blind and Rivkah was not. Rivkah was 37 years younger than Yitzchak, did not look the other way regarding Eisav, did not accept bribes from Eisav, was not present at the akeidah, and was not in the position to give the beracha to Yaakov. However, according to the first p’shat in Rashi that Yitzchak’s blindness was caused by the smoke of the avodah zarrah offered in their house by Eisav’s wives, how was it that Rivkah was not blinded as well? Rivkah lived in the same house as Yitzchak and should have also experienced loss of eyesight due to the avodah zarrah smoke. Why wasn’t Rivkah affected the same way?

            The Sifsei Chochomim[12], as well as the Chizkuni[13] are bothered by this question and offer the following explanation. They explain that Rivkah grew up in a home of reshaim (wicked people) who were ovdei avodah zarrah (idol worshippers), whereas Yitzchak grew up in the pure house of Avraham. Growing up among reshaim like Lavan and Besuel, Rivkah was exposed to all possible forms of avodah zarrah and chose not to tag along. In a sense, she built immunity toward avodah zarrah from her childhood that she carried with her the rest of her life. Thus, despite her eyes unknowingly breathing in the same avodah zarrah smoke as Yitzchak, her immunity allowed her to come out unscathed while Yitzchak was taken off-guard being introduced to a level of tumah (impurity) that he grew up so careful to avoid. 

            The idea that growing up in a house of avodah zarrah allowed Rivkah to be better equipped to deal with the situation that she was put in later on in life is in stark contrast to Rashi in the beginning of the parsha during the time that Yitzchak and Rivkah were davening to be able to have a child. The passuk[14] there states, “Yitzchak entreated Hashem opposite his wife, because she was barren. Hashem allowed Himself to be entreated by him, and his wife Rivkah conceived.” Rashi[15]comments that the passuk says that Hashem answered Yitzchak specifically as opposed to Rivkah because the prayer of a righteous person who is the child of a wicked person (i.e. Rivkah daughter of Besuel) is not comparable to the prayer of a righteous person who is the child of a righteous person (i.e. Yitzchak son of Avraham).

How could we come to term with these two ideas? Which path is better: Growing up in the house of Avraham where dust had to be washed off one’s feet before entering lest it contain remnants of avodah zarrah; or the house of Besuel where explicitly forbidden expressions were encouraged? At first glance it seems from the parsha that either way has its pros and cons. On the one hand, growing up in Avraham’s house allows for a higher level of relationship and appreciation of Hashem, yet left inexperienced to deal with “real-life” struggles. On the other hand, Rivkah’s ability to navigate struggles was superior as she had her dosages of immunity shots as a child, yet was lacking the wholesomeness and capacity for an extra spiritual relationship which accompanies one who grew up among great figures.  Seemingly the argument could be made either way. Which is correct? 

            The Derech Hashem[16] discusses the system of individual providence that Hashem exhibits in the world. He writes that each person according to his or her qualities are put into specifically designed environments in order to provide the opportunity for the individual to be tested within his own capacity. The Derech Hashem further elaborates that every single person’s predicament in life is by definition his own challenge. Hashem divided myriads of tailored challenges throughout the human race as a means to fulfill His profound plan which is beyond human comprehension. Every individual has his own unique battle with the yetzer hara (evil inclination) that is his own responsibility to fight and prove to be victorious. After 120 years, a person is judged not by what he did compared to others and not even necessarily if he accomplished what he might have perceived as being the full battle. Rather, the person will be judged solely based on his own abilities and challenges given to him by Hashem and the extent that Hashem in His infinite wisdom determined that the person has the ability to reach. 

The Derech Hashem compares this system to a body of government. A country’s leader will put together a vast government system with many people in place, each performing a specific task that they are able to undertake. There are cabinet members, governors, tax collectors, janitorial staff, and everything in between. It would be unjust to say that a cabinet member makes a bad governor, a governor a bad tax collector, or a janitor an incompetent president. Every person has their own talents and abilities and is therefore expected to perform very different roles. All are necessary and the government would not function at capacity if any of the departments was not doing its part. Similarly, Hashem runs the world with a master plan beyond human comprehension. However the one thing we could comprehend, at least partially, is that as similar as every human being is at the core, the aggregate of nuances within each individual ultimately yields a completely different person. Imagine comparing two people’s faces millimeter by millimeter zoomed in, it will be practically impossible to find any noticeable differences, yet when zoomed out the color, complexion and details are so different. The same is true of a person’s interior. Comparing two people it is easy to say on a simple level that they both have levels of haughtiness, cruelty, hate, desires, jealousy, etc. Yet the reality is that both the sources and manifestations of each person’s middos (traits) could come from such totally different places that it is hard enough to fully comprehend what makes someone tick, let alone understand which areas are challenges for him or her to overcome.

Each person has their own life settings they are born into and specific challenges they are faced with during their lifetime. These nisyonos (tests) are from Hashem and it is our job to do our best to fight. Fighting for one person might mean completely obliterating, while for another it might mean overcoming just slightly. However one thing that we do not always consider is that it is possible for a person to bring unauthorized nisyonos onto oneself. A person with his bechira (free choice) and especially with lack of full control of his middos could allow himself to drift and enter an arena of nisyonos that was never meant for him. This is extremely dangerous because although one might have the basic tools to fight off and exit while it is still the beginning of the battle, there is no guarantee that he will even be carrying the right weapons to do so long term. It is therefore of utmost importance to distinguish between nisyonos that we are born with and naturally lean to during our lives, and those which we almost put in the extra effort to go out of our way to introduce ourselves to. 

It is a deep and profound trick of the yetzer harrah to convince us that a nisayon we were introduced to is just a test and we have to try our best. Of course, as a rule it is an axiom of truth, but to be applied to circumstances we allow ourselves to drift to is extremely dangerous and is a snare which could chas vshalom lead to a point of literally being up a creek without a paddle. 

In the last beracha of birchas ha’shachar we ask Hashem to please protect us that we should not come to sin, to embarrassment or to nisayon (test). On the surface, this is a very strange request. After all, since the beginning of time, nisyonos have been known as an integral aspect of creation to challenge man’s bechira and properly reward and punish according to each individual’s capacity. Why would we ask Hashem to protect us from entering nisyonos as opposed to simply helping us succeed in our nisyonos?

Perhaps the answer is along the lines which we are discussing. Certainly Hashem purposely and sends each of us tailored nisyonos to challenge our middos and bechira. However, there is another class of nisyonos which we are able to put on ourselves through our own drifting and effort exerted into trying “new things”. Those forms of nisyonos are not tailored to us by Hashem’s Wisdom but rather by our own foolishness. These are the nisyonos we ask Hashem to protect us from entering. We daven that Hashem help us not veer off the path of our own problems and struggles and become enticed with someone else’s challenges.[17]

Perhaps this is the foundation to really understanding the p’shat of the Sifsei Chochomim and the Chizkuni. Rivkah was born into a house of avodah zarrah. That was a nisayon she was born into clearly given to her directly by Hashem to overcome which she did with flying colors despite the incredible pressures from family and friends to worship avodahzarrah. Yitzchak avinu on the other hand, was not presented with the nisayon of avodah zarrah. He was born into the family of Avraham avinu who ensured that no trace of avodah zarrah made its way into his home.

The two Rashis we contrasted earlier are discussing two very different points. Rashi in the beginning of the parsha refers to the special place that a tzadik ben tzadik has in Hashem’s eyes because of the good he and his ancestors brought to the world and the relationship with Hashem that they value. Hashem’s extra willingness to listen to the tefillos (prayers) of a tzadik ben tzadik is reciprocating the beautiful kesher (connection) which was formed through the toil of avodas Hashem that the tzadikim established. The Rashi later which singles out Yitzchak as the only one negatively affected from the smoke of avodah zarrah that Eisav’s wives offered in his home is a demonstration of the consequence of Yitzchak avinu being introduced to the smallest trace of a nisayon which he was not meant to be introduced to. Although we are in no place to find fault in the avos or begin to understand why they did some of the things they did, at some level Yitzchak was responsible for allowing Eisav and Eisav’s wives to worship avodah zarrah, and was certainly solely culpable for letting it seep into his house. This was an area of nisayon which Yitzchak was not necessarily supposed to have anything to do with, but for reasons of keeping Eisav around in the way he did, he was ultimately introduced to a nisayon which he – Yitzchak avinu – was not equipped to deal with. Of course Yitzchak was not involved even the slightest, and as the Ramban explains, he was even under the impression it was being done l’sheim shamayim. Yet, still the brief encounter of the slight product of their aveiros, the mere smoke that dispersed in the air, had an adverse impact on Yitzchak and caused him to go blind. Imagine the danger it could have led to had there been a broader contact, chas v’shalom. Rivkah on the other hand had been given that particular nisayon during her childhood by Hashem, and passed with flying colors; therefore the later mistaken entry of remnants of avodah zarrah into her life had no effect on her.

This is a vital lesson for us to keep in mind: Don’t pick your poison. Hashem in His infinite wisdom has the sole ability to determine what nisyonos are proper for us and sets a unique expectation for each individual. We cannot determine this for ourselves nor could we even pretend to be capable of doing so. Our responsibility is to accept the nisyonos Hashem gives us with love and do our best to fight and win as well as to make sure that we do not get sucked into the nisyonos that others are dealing with in the world which we see through the proverbial glass window and may be enticed to open the door to try out. We must bear in mind that it is relatively easy to stay away from new enticing things. However it is exceedingly more difficult to stop doing something once a barrier has been breached especially given the fact that if we venture too far into uncharted territory we may find ourselves ill-equipped to find the exit. 

May Hashem help us by providing us with the siyata dishimaya to overcome our nisyonos as well as the strength to stay away from the nisyonos which we may have to see out of the corner of our eyes as they belong to those we interact with, but that are not really there for us ourselves to encounter.

---

[1] Beraishis 27:1

[2] Shmuel Alef 3:2

[3] Beraishis 27:1

[4] Shmuel Alef 4:15

[5] Shmuel Alef 3:13

[6] Beraishis 27:1

[7] Medrash Tanchuma Toldos 8

[8] Devarim 16:19

[9] Beraishis 27:1

[10] Ibid.

[11] See Beraishis Rabbah 65:10

[12] Beraishis 27:1

[13] Ibid.

[14] Beraishis 25:21

[15] Rashi ibid.

[16] Derech Hashem 2:3

[17] I heard the application of this p’shat to the beracha in birchas ha’ashachar from Rabbi Steinhardt, ra”m Ner Yisroel

Parshas Chayei Sarah - Out of the Foxhole and Into the Parking Spot

~ Thoughts on the Parsha ~

Parshas Chayei Sarah

Out of the Foxhole and Into the Parking Spot

                                                                   By: Daniel Listhaus

וַיִּקֹּד הָאִישׁ וַיִּשְׁתַּחוּ לה': וַיּאֹמֶר בָּרוּךְ ה' אֱ לֹקי אֲדֹנִי אַבְרָהָם אֲשֶׁר לאֹ עָזַב חַסְדּוֹ וַאֲמִתּוֹ מֵעִם
אֲדֹנִי אָנֹכִי בַּדֶּרֶךְ נָחַנִי ה' בֵּית אֲחֵי אֲדֹנִי:

“And the man bowed low and prostrated himself to Hashem. He said, ‘Blessed is Hashem, G-d of my master Avraham, Who has not withheld His kindness and truth from my master; as for me, Hashem has guided me in the way to the house of my master’s brothers.”

 -Chayei Sarah 24:26-27

            Avraham sent his servant, Eliezer, to find a wife for Yitzchak. If we stop to think about it, Eliezer truly had a great responsibility. Avraham trusted that Eliezer would not just find the proper wife for Yitzchak, but the proper matriarch for B’nei Yisroel. There is no doubt that the trust that Avraham had in Eliezer was developed over their many years together and Eliezer becoming a great person from spending time in Avraham avinu’s house.[1] Eliezer recognized the importance of his assignment and understood that the only way he could carry it out successfully was to daven to Hashem to help him find the right person. The passukim (verses) describe in detail the tefillos that Eliezer davened to Hashem to give him a sign when he would cross paths with the right wife for Yitzchak. Not only does the Torah mention Eliezer’s tefillos, but it expresses that the story line played out exactly as he davened and then repeats the whole episode again when Eliezer told it over to Lavan and Besuel in their house. Rashi[2] points the repetitiveness and says in the name of Rebbe Acha that the conversation of the slaves of the avos (patriarchs) is more pleasing before Hashem than the Torah of their descendants; for the episode of Eliezer is repeated expressly in the Torah, while many essential elements of the Torah were given only by allusion.” Indeed the middos and mehalech in life that we learn for generations is based on the interactions and ma’aseh avos siman l’banim from the avos themselves. It is as essential as the halachos of the Torah, in fact derech eretz kadmah l’torah, and is an essential part of Torah shel ba’al peh – mishnayos Avos.

            Tefillah is something which is part of every Jew’s daily routine. We daven three times a day representing the tefillos implemented by the Avos[3] and although over the years we have accepted a universal structure to the davening, there is no question that personal prayers and requests are not just proper, but arguably required, throughout the day as we humble ourselves before Hashem and recognize that we are nothing without his constant help. The realization that we need Hashem to help us is one which, for many, comes and goes. The saying goes that there is no such thing as an atheist in a foxhole, but sadly the underlying meaning of that aphorism often extends to even the most religious. The Torah itself describes the difficulty man has of recognizing G-d’s involvement in one’s personal life when one achieves success through means which seem natural. As people we are programmed to recognize pattern, and the pattern of cause and effect is one that was built into the briyah (creation) as a guide but could also be misleading to the one who does not stop to think hard of what the real causes and effects are. However, even those who do take time out of their day to stop and personally ask Hashem for help with their day, and even those who stop to take the time to ask Hashem for help even for the things which we think we are “capable” of doing on our “own”, there is something which is often forgotten – saying thank you.

            There is a joke told of a man who is running late to an important meeting. When he reaches the office he cannot find an open parking spot. In desperation he davens to Hashem and says, “Hashem please give me a parking spot; and if You give me a parking spot I promise that I will be a better person.” Suddenly, a spot opens up right in front of him. He races over and takes the spot proudly. After putting his car in park, exiting his car and locking the doors, he looks up and says, “Never mind, I found one myself!”

            Even the times we remember that G-d is in charge and are able to humble ourselves to ask for His assistance, we often forget to turn back and say thank you to Hashem when we recognize our tefillos were accepted. Instead, like the man looking for the parking spot, the approach of many is to say, “I’m glad things worked out, because Hashem would have probably taken a long time to return my call”.

            The episode of Eliezer finding a wife for Yitzchak is remarkable on many accounts. However, one of the points that often goes unnoticed is the fact that at every opportunity along the way Eliezer takes the time to reflect and give thanks to Hashem for helping him and answering his tefillos. After Rivkah offered to get water for Eliezer and his camels and Eliezer realized that she was the right wife for Yitzchak, the passuk writes that he bowed and gave thanks to Hashem. Even when Eliezer recounted the series of events leading to his meeting Rivkah, he included the fact that he thanked Hashem as an integral part of the storyline. A few passukim later after Lavan and Besuel agree to Eliezer’s proposal to bring Rivkah back to Yitzchak as a wide, Eliezer again bowed to Hashem over hearing the good news. Davening always yields results, even when we do not merit to experience the outcome ourselves. However certainly when we do perhaps even when we don’t, it demands a sense of gratitude. Modim is part of the core structure of tefillah.

            If these were the middos of eved Avraham we could only imagine how great our forefather Avraham was with his deep understanding of Hashem being Creator, Master and Director of the world. This is not a theme tied to a specific day but rather one which is timeless and constant. We must learn from this parsha our responsibility to not only turn to Hashem and depend on Him completely to help us through life but also to remember to turn back and say thank you.

            May Hashem help us all and guide us accordingly through our lives and provide us with all our needs as a k’lal and as individuals. Thank you, Hashem, for all that You have done for us, all that You do for us, and all that we have faith that You will continue to do for all of K’lal Yisroel!

---

[1] Additionally, Avraham also made Eliezer swear. See Beraishis 24:2-4

[2] Beraishis 24:42

[3] See Gemara Berachos 26b. Another opinion maintains that shacharis and mincha were established based in the karbon tamid that was offered morning and afternoon.